A little change

So I've been debating this decision for awhile. Debating on my relationship status, that is.

What exactly is my status? Complicated. Complicated by the fact that I'm in a different country, by the fact that we're both incredibly shy around each other, and by the simple fact that I've only spent time with him during my vacation in January.

I have only 62 days left in South Korea and J remembered that last night when he called. :)

I hung out with a Kiwi last Saturday and was sharply reminded of J...I really wanted to call him or see him again, but I know it'll be soon. I'm all sorts of nervous and excited to see him at the airport when I arrive. He's picking me up. :)

What's not complicated are my feelings.

Five for Friday

Another week has come to an end. I'm glad the rain stopped for the afternoon, although I'm not holding out hope that it lasts through the evening. It would be nice though! Monsoon season started this Tuesday. We've had torrential rain for the last three days straight. Let's just say I'm really grateful to be leaving this all behind me in 2 months. It's the last week of June now and I'm freaking out a bit...what happened to this month? I mean seriously, where did it go? Yikes! Although, I am 67 days from taking off from South Korea for my new adventure in NZ! YAY! The excitement might kill me.


I have fallen in love with Owl City again...got the album finally and LOVE The Bird and the Worm..."with fronds like these, who needs anemones?" teehee.


Now that I'm getting closer to moving to NZ, I am trying to focus what I want my living space to look like once I get a rental place. Mostly having to do with colors...I may or may not end up living in a really teal house!


I adore this ring very much...I've always liked clannagh rings and knotwork in general, but what I really like about this is that it's more delicate than any clannagh ring I've seen before.


This is my first car...it's a 93 Mitsubishi Gallant. I've never owned a car before in my life, so this was a pretty huge deal for me!


New favorite video from this season's So You Think You Can Dance. I was ambivalent until I saw this dance last night. See it HERE!!!!

I hope you have a wonderful weekend and that you manage to stay drier than I have!

Five for Friday

This week is finally done! Yay! I feel like yesterday was Monday though. I got home last night and then realized that the next day was Friday and I was suddenly thrilled. Time is flying by. I've been busy with my new online class, it's full of great ideas for differentiating instruction to meet the needs of diverse learners and I am itching to try some out. I've already changed a couple aspects of my classroom format to get more interaction between the students (besides cheating on writing assignments in the book) and I'm pretty pleased so far. I think this is the best class I've done so far and I'm only a week in. It's really practical applications that I can use now instead of research or theory-based work. I enjoy research and theory though, but it's not at all helpful in my current teaching situation. Anyway, today is Friday and I have only 74 days left at my school and 75 days before I leave. How exciting is that? VERY!


This sunset reminds me of my trip to Golden Bay a couple years back in NZ. I was walking along a path trying to find the other beach supposedly within walking distance, which I never found, but the lighting was gorgeous at this time and I recall a sense of profound peace. Alone with my camera on a path with only a bellowing bull to keep me on my toes.



Umm...yes please. I want this sink and view. Sigh, I think I must be a Suzy-homemaker at heart.



I am continually being reminded of the love I have for people and the love they have for me. We're all connected through love.



This is a very true quote. Way to go Maya. I forget a lot of things these days, but the way someone has made me feel is something that hasn't been lost in the recesses of my mind.



I feel pretty stupid most of the time teaching in SK. It's not that I'm incompetent by any means, but it's just I find grammar rules (or lack thereof) really hard to explain to kids in simple terms. I guess I really don't understand it well enough!

Also, I'm thinking about doing Pinterest...(is that what it's called?) I don't think I can keep saving things indefinitely on my desktop at work and I'd like to start giving credit for where I find stuff, but can't do so when I save things throughout the week. Maybe I should look into that thing and see if that will do the trick. Thoughts on it?

Enjoy your weekend and tell someone you love them this weekend. You know there's at least one person you love that wouldn't mind hearing it. I know I wouldn't mind it one bit!

Happy Thoughts for Wednesday

I think that life is all about perspective. It's easy to get bogged down by the bad things going on, the disappointments and the trials thrown our way. We need to practice changing our perspective in order to overcome things. I feel that I still complain a lot about things going on that I can't control or that I'm not 100% happy with, but I'm trying to change that.

Here are some happy thoughts for Wednesday that are buoying me up right now.

~~I get to hang out with some friends Friday night and eat at my favorite Korean restaurant.

~~I got a surprise phone call last night after 8pm from J. Usually we call each other around 7:30. Since I didn't get a call around that time, I figured I wasn't getting one at all. You get bonus points for that one. ;)

~~I have finished my final Market Day in South Korea...I really do not enjoy doing it at all. So much work, no break all day and psychotic kids crazy about shopping.

~~I am not having the terrible reaction from my school that I feared would happen when I told them I was leaving at the end of August. They're sad about it, but aren't being vindictive about it at all. Yay for working with adults.

~~The weather has been absolutely amazing so far this summer. I know there's a heat wave back home and I'm not looking forward to the typical Korean summer weather that is bound to come, but I am so glad it's held off so far.

~~I am so happy to be loved by so many people. Love in my life makes the bad days better and the long days shorter. I'm a sap and I can't deny it!

Five for Friday

Well, I finally did it. I finally told my school I'm leaving. August 31st will be my last day of work and then I'll fly out September 2nd to my new great adventure in New Zealand. I typed up a letter explaining things for my school and then took it to my co-teacher. She read it and then we talked about it a little. Then we both cried. In my defense I started crying because she started crying. I'm a softy like that. Anyway, it's out in the open and now I can get more serious about finishing things up here and then moving in 81 days. After this weekend I'll be in the 70s! Yay. It was hard to do but I know it's the right move to be making. Now to find a replacement teacher for my school.


Needing a bit of funny on today.


I've never been much of a stripes fan, but this room is fantastic!


I think it's the blue in this kitchen I'm loving.


I had to read the image out loud before I got it. Sometimes I'm a bit dense, but overall, not really!


Lovely.

just a little happy here

I got to see J last night for the first time since February. I hope I get to see him more often than every three months on Skype...oh wait, I will see him in 3 months! 84 days to be more precise.

It was nice to chat face to face though instead of just by phone. If I didn't have to do my final paper or Doug didn't have to go to bed, I think we could have kept talking for a couple more hours last night.

He has a beard now...I like it.

Now I really can't wait to get back to Nelson...sigh. I can make it.

Five for Friday

I'm going to start out by saying that I'm officially under 3 months left here! 88 days and counting. It's been a long week too...I'm so glad it's Friday! Yesterday I sat down at the end of my teaching day (six classes, no co-teacher and a bunch of parents watching) and realized that, hey, tomorrow is Friday! That's a very good thing to realize. I think this next fact might be a little sad. I left my phone sitting on my desk yesterday and guess what? No one called or texted me the next 16 hours. There were no missed calls when I came in this morning. Haha. Why do I bother paying for a cellphone anyway?


As I enter the home stretch and prepare to tell my school I'm quitting, I have to keep reminding myself of the amazing things that lay in store for me when I do go to NZ. It won't be easy, but nothing really worth it ever is. I truly believe that.


I finally have been able to download two of The Paper Kites' songs when the released their new single on Wednesday. I'm so happy about it. I've played them on repeat for about 30 minutes the last couple of days. Don't judge!


So true.



I just started watching this British comedy recently- Black Books. It is really funny and fortunately is short enough that I can watch an episode before bed without falling asleep partway through. It is just the latest in a line of comedy shows I've never quite gotten around to watching but have been convinced by J that I should watch them. This works both ways though- he's hooked on The Mighty Boosh and Spaced, so I think we're good.



I'm ready for a summer in Nelson spent where the sky is always blue and the views take my breath away. I am NOT looking forward to my final summer in South Korea.

Learning to say 'yes'

I feel the need to lay a few things out that have been on my mind lately. As I draw closer to moving back to New Zealand I have been starting to get more questions as to my motives and intentions and whether I've thought this through all the way. I feel that I need to explain myself and what has changed about me.

It's been almost one year since my little brother Stephen passed away. It's been a tumultuous year since then as well. I know that before he died I wasn't sure when I was going to start my goals or really even what I wanted out of my life. I was a 27 year old flake without a solid lead. In the aftermath, I realized that life is just too damn short to keep putting things off. Tutti posted a creative writing assignment on facebook a few months afterward and I was struck by her description of me. I was like a tree with no direction, full of promise but no follow-thru(basically). I realized I didn't want to be a tree of wasted potential, but I really wanted something out of my life. So I thought about things, prayed about them and came to realize what it was I wanted. Since that point, I've started taking charge and not delaying getting what I want anymore.

This is why I'm moving back to NZ earlier than planned. I know what I want. I want to be there and I can financially do it without danger. I want to spend more time with the people I care about and settle down to start a new chapter in my life. I'm tired of being transient and not having a plan or a permanent address. I want to say "Yes" to life and not regret something out of fear or holding back.

I want to be the hero of my own story and I don't want to wait for the next chapter to start. In just over one month I will be turning 28 and I don't want to look around anymore and think I'm wasting my time in a place or job that I don't passionately love. Don't get me wrong, I do love South Korea but I have known for three years now that this was never supposed to be the permanent part of my life. I just figured that until I knew that place, this wasn't so bad. Well...New Zealand is that place and what's the point in waiting?

Is it going to be difficult? Sure, it will be. I have to get a job, buy a car, rent a house and apply for residency.

Is it going to be worth it? Absolutely 100%. I have thought about it, prayed about it and feel calm in my heart about moving back 8 months ahead of schedule. There are people who love and support me with this. I know it's the right move.

So I'm saying "Yes" to this and other things as well. It's about time I start the life I want instead of living the life I have because it's comfortable and easy. I'm almost 28 years old and all I have to my name is a dog, my sewing machine and my dreams. It's time to make those dreams a reality and keep growing up.

I want to live in honor of my brother, who lived with no fear or regret. Who never compromised and loved fiercely. I want to be like him, except maybe not quite so much swearing! ;)

hmm

I'm working on some thoughts this week. Look for something either interesting or deep, or neither, in a couple days. The word 'yes' is playing an important role here.

xo